It’s midnight, I’m pooped. I’ve been fending off the burnout since about 3:30 yesterday.
You mamas know the burnout I speak of. You’re most likely nodding in understanding right now.
I just packed up three different lunch boxes, you knew the drill. Cheese for her, pretzels for him, crust on, crust off…etc etc, and no it’s not lost on me how blessed I am to have a fridge full of food to throw into those lunch boxes.
It’s finals week for David which means he’s dead on his feet and we’ve seen him awake for maybe three hours since Monday. But this too shall pass and we have a Christmas vacation at the end of the tunnel.
I have been abundantly blessed with business which means I’ve been at my machines around the clock and working until 3 am most nights. Averaging about4 hours of Z’s a night.
All of these, good things! Food. Jobs. Business. Paid bills. God’s grace. I am thankful and am not trying to come across as complaining so please don’t misunderstand me, dear reader.
This morning I started my day bright and early for an 8:30 am pediatrician appointment. Seems we have a certain princess who can’t shake a pesky cough, I was exhausted after working until 2 am and it seems I’ll be doing it again tonight, I LOVE this holiday rush. It really is exciting! I’m grateful for my business and I’m enjoying every bit of what I do.
But after a dr appointment and taking a very tired daddy some breakfast, we got home and attempted nap time. An hour into the “routine” I had to seperate the twins. So little man roosted with me and miss princess (who likes to sprawl and kick the covers off) slept in her big girl bed. My little guy needed extra tlc today which meant he clutched me tightly and wouldn’t let me go during nap time…By the time everyone was awake it was time to fetch the oldest from school, come home, get ready for church, kiss daddy goodbye until 11:00 pm and off we all went.
I didn’t get any work done.
So at midnight after every one is bathed and asleep and I’ve packed lunches and dug through the laundry pile for outfits that somewhat coordinate, I’m heading downstairs to my lair to put in another 3 am’er. I made a pit stop to the ladies room, (tmi I am truly sorry) and that’s when I see them.
Cars. Shoes. Crumpled little dirty socks. All on my bathroom floor.
Instantly I remember the very moment that afternoon when those shoes were wedged off by tiny impatient hands, when those socks were peeled away exposing ten perfect, wiggly piggies, when those cars were clacked together and motored around on the floor…all while he waited patiently for me. All while I impatiently tried to divert this little person’s attention to another part of the house.
It humbled me, if I’m being honest. All day long I’m walking around in a tired stupor, going through the motions and somehow I missed the significance of these remnants on my bathroom floor.
We mamas joke about this a lot, don’t we? Not remembering the last time we went to the bathroom alone. And it’s true! In the toddler years it is so true. But when you stop to think about it, loving someone so much that you would, well…that you would follow them to the bathroom just to be with them? That’s a pretty great love.
So for all you mamas out there, tired, worn out, run ragged, spread thin, I salute you! And I share my Reese’s with you…in spirit ha! But also…I pray cars on your bathroom floor. I pray the blessing of little hands patting your leg, little voices asking you questions, little helpers flushing your commode one, two…five times in a row (cringing at the water wasted)
Because what a blessing to be followed by little feet, what a privilege to be helped by tiny hands and what a humbling experience to be mimicked by such innocent spirits.